Pack Your Bags, Lady!

Somewhere, in the land of female, there is a guidebook that insists women bring every single hair and makeup product that they have ever owned and pack it with them when they travel, even if that travel consists of only driving down the block and staying for one night.

When I decided to venture into the world of “womanhood”  NO ONE shared this with me… NO ONE!  I did not realize that in order for me to replicate the same look that I oh-so-eloquently “throw together” in the mornings that I MUST carry ALL of the same damn products with me when traveling in order to achieve the same “throw together” affect, which my post Glam-it UP! clearly states that I am not good at perfecting this skill.

I thought my new “less than tom-boyish and more feminine” routine that I’ve been practicing for the past year was rather simple when comparing it to the routines of other women.  Until I had to pack for a trip, that is.

After doing so for a couple of trips this past summer, I’ve decided that this whole process is crap.  What happened to simplicity?  What happened to a woman hopping out of bed and the world seeing her as beautiful in her own natural way?

Thus, my adventure always begins with how to pack the essentially nonessential products to continue my longer-than-necessary beauty regime while on the road:

Shower Time- Hotel Shampoo and Conditioner are both crap, especially for those of us with long hair.  If you want to fight and bald your way through brushing your hair after using the provided complimentary soap, then by all means, continue.   But, if your goal is to come out with manageable locks, then plan on adding your own hair soap to the products list.

Body Soap- Ok honestly, it’s a hit or miss.  I don’t mind using the thin bar of soap provided, but every time I get out of the shower I’m filled with immediate regret after sighting the dry scaly skin that haunts me in the aftermath.

Body Lotion- Everywhere!  Now, some hotels provide a complimentary bottle of body lotion and some hotels do not.  Hey, if you want to risk not having body lotion in your room, then go without.  But me?  That’s a risk I’m not willing to take.

Facial Protectent and Face Moisturizer for Oil Skin- I’m plagued with oily skin.  Thanks, parents, for that one.   Anyway, in order for me to apply makeup, I must apply a moisturizer specially made for oily skin to prevent my face from looking extra oily.  I have yet to even notice any dramatic improvement with my continued use.  The Facial Protectant is used because the sales lady said I had to.  Yep, I’m a sucker.

Hair products- While the magical face stuff is “working its magic”, I apply a leave-in conditioner and moroccan argan oil to prevent my naturally frizzy/curly hair from being unruly.  I move on to other processes while allowing for product “setting” time (ugh…)

Makeup- The drudgery of makeup product application.  The process itself is exhausting, time-consuming and absolutely tedious!  List includes:

Eye makeup: Eye primer (helps keep the color in place and adds vibrancy to color), multitude of eye shadow colors, eye liner, mascara, and eyebrow liner (trust me, my eyebrows require it).  Don’t forget all the brushes that go along with applying eye shadows.

Face-Coverage: Foundation all over face, bronzer and/or blush to the cheekbone area, finishing powder and finishing spritzer spray (I’m sure the sales lady saw the “sucker” sign stamped on my forehead on that one too).  Don’t forget all the brushes that go along with it.  I don’t even scratch the surface on the products that a lot of girls use, such as concealer for acne, concealer for dark circles, face primer,  contouring powders, etc.  The list goes on.

Back to the Hair- Don’t forget all the tools that go along with fixing the hair for the day.  The hair dryer and hair straightener and/or any other hair tools that your imagination can come up with.  Oh!  And any finishing sprays that are currently on the market.  Because, you know, after all that bull crap you just went through it would be a pity if it all went to shit as soon as you stepped out the door.

Final hoorah is putting on clothes, picking out shoes And the PURSE to MATCH! Because what would be the point in going through all that trouble if you’re stepping out wearing a garbage bag?

What has this boiled down to?  About 50 articles of crap that gets lugged in its own special travel bag from point A to point B.

Most days, I don’t go through any of this trouble… at all, actually.  I’ve narrowed down my beauty routine to only take place on my days off from work, for a special event or the sighting of a “special someone”.  Seems like the opposite action for most.  But, considering I sit in a room all night long with little-to-no human contact, it would be pointless to go through the daunting task.  Now, if a change of employment is achieved, then maybe, just maybe, would this role reverse and fit in with the rest of society.

For now, I guess I’ll continue playing dress-up one to two days out of the week and maybe, just maybe, it’ll come to some good use and I’ll land a chance to also wear a few of those cool dresses collecting dust in the back of my closet  🙂

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